We are not alone!

Hi everyone! My day didn't start so good. It started with pain and feeling very alone as I walked early of the tennis court this morning. I know you are probably thinking *TENNIS?!* Well, I love it and do it purely for emotional reasons. Normally I walk of the court and feel great albeit in pain. This morning I walked of in pain and very depressed that fibro is taking away my joy! I came home crying, got into bed and put on my computer. I read through all the blogs I follow and commented on some. You know what I got in return? Inspiration, hope and just not feeling alone! I dislike it very much when other people complain all the time over very small things! I don't, or try not to, complain alot. I have always just been like that. I never wanted to be the friend or daughter or wife or mother that was always complaining. I also don't want people to worry about me the whole time.I feel very guilty when I cause other people worry and stress. That is not to say I don't complain at all. I do! What I have realised though is that if I don't say something then everyone expects me to carry on as normal. That, I can't do either. For me its a bit of a catch 22 situation. If I complain then everyone worries and if I don't then I'm expected to feel normal. Sometimes I wish that everyone around us could feel what we feel. Then they will know exactly when I'm ok and when I'm not. These feelings can really make one feel so alone. I find myself grabbing my pad every now and again to see if someone wrote a new post etc. Blogging has been my lifesaver! By just reading people's blogs and by writing on my own blog I have found new understanding and friendship. That, in turn, has given me new ways to cope with this chronic illness and inspires me to give support to other people that know exactly how I feel.